It has been a long time since I have been writing here. But today I felt like writing, even though I have no clue what and why. And then I found some, kind of funny, but also dead serious comments about this page. That people were looking to read about “internal bathing”, found my site, found this page, and then found I was not in the mood writing about it. And I am still not, as I just wanted to write, wanted to do something else than “do nothing” in this COVID-19 period, where I am basically quarantined at home. Not really forced here, in Cagayan de Oro City, Philippines, but virtually everything is closed, so nothing really to do also.
So maybe back to the phrase “internal bathing”. And actually I am a bit amazed that people expected an article about it. As to me it is pretty obvious what “internal bathing” is or would be: do internal cleanup, clean your mind or spirit or whatever from rubbish and cobwebs and whatever is obscuring your mind, obscuring your vision of, yes, what?
And I started writing as I just wanted to add stuff about what keeps me busy at the moment. As I just wanted to share. But the main problem is that there is so much to share. Too much to write, as my writing could never keep up with what I am thinking and feeling. And my thoughts and feelings change so quickly, so it is really hard to stay with the subject at hand: “Internal Bathing”.
But yes, this kind of relates to “internal bathing”, as writing helps me to clear things up in my mind. That is why I guess most of my articles are not finished, not put in proper order, as I have been mainly writing for myself I guess. And this reminds me of some of the things Jordan Peterson said in YouTube videos I was watching, listening to, recently. He talked about how he worked as psychologist, just listening to people, as listening to someone may just help him or her to, yes, clear his or her thoughts, help them clean their internal mess (internal bathing?!).
So while writing I am thinking about how to organize this site, or organize it better. As I don’t feel like being the person writing all kinds of nice, well written, well researched articles about things like “internal bathing”, or whatever pages I made in this site. Actually, while writing, I just like to share my thoughts, not really researched. Just share my opinion.
So would there be a market for that? Well, I guess so. As this site still relates to ‘success’, yes, including, or maybe specifically, my personal success. As I still want to be rich and famous, and this site was intended to make me rich and famous.
Ah, and while writing I am listening to music, the music of Foreigner, music I listened to when I was a student, more than thirty years ago. And this music brings up a lot of feelings, emotions, about the time I was a student, a period in which I was kind of desperately looking for a lover, a partner, a lover and partner. So I have been crying a lot the last few days. No clue why, but I easily cry when I am emotional, even so much I can’t even really talk, can’t even share my thoughts and feelings to the people around me. So maybe yes, maybe that is also internal bathing, maybe my crying a lot the last few days listening to especially the songs Urgent and Cold as Ice, especially the live versions. One of the versions of Urgent I even uploaded here to share with my mom. Strange, it starts playing when I looked for the link to copy. And the strange thing is I never really liked live versions of songs, live performances, but right now I prefer the live versions, as they are so much more “real” than the studio versions. So much more ‘raw’, more ‘raw life’, performed in real circumstances with real audience, by real people.
So what will I do now? I did some internal bathing, but again, don’t really feel like writing more here right now.
But maybe it is enough. At least I started again.
Someone asked me to write about what I think ‘internal bathing’ is. Well, I guess I can try.
And kind of funny, as when I search ‘internal bathing’, my own post related to internal bathing is on top: self analysis question 21. And an article about physical internal bathing is on second place: how to take a (physical) internal bath. And funny because when thinking about internal bathing I would never think of physical internal cleaning, always about mental internal cleaning.
Actually I would expect an article on Wikipedia about internal bathing, not even my own site and certainly not an article about physical internal cleaning.
Ah, and I am not really in the mood writing a serious article about internal bathing, so maybe I made a mistake starting this now. Also so many unfinished articles in this site I guess. Not sure what to do with that. As yes, I think it has become quite some site, even though it does not have much traffic. The last I don’t fully understand, as I think there is quite some content, but maybe the content is not good enough (for Google). Trying to make up for that with adding photos, like in this article. And yes, i know the resizing on Android doesn’t work properly. Did some research about that earlier, last week. I will probably fix that this week, next week.
And yes, big mistake using a standard WordPress theme and changing it technically. I guess I knew that when I did that, not fully knowing how to make a WordPress theme yet at the time. I guess I will also have to spend some time fixing that, but it may be hard to find my own (framework) code.