I was kind of complaining to a friend that my life is not working, that I am fully stuck again. And that I don’t know what to do. Then she mentioned a friend who had recovered from whatever addiction and was earning millions a month (again). Then I asked if he could teach me and then she replied he had two posters with two words in his bedroom, so I asked what words were on the posters, and after a while she replied ‘goal’ and ‘strategy’. Those things sound very familiar to me as I set goals many times and applied a strategy to reach them. And I succeeded many times, most of the times I guess. Or maybe even all the times. Then still I did not feel satisfied and I replied something like ‘been there, done that’, and yes, those things worked. Except that in general after reaching the goals they fell apart. So somehow it doesn’t work for me, or it does work, but not the way I want it. Then she replied something like that indeed we have to find our own way to live a healthy and successful life. And that was it.
Then of course those things stuck in my mind, as of course I know very well that things like setting goals and creating a strategy, thinking about a strategy, implementing a strategy and working the strategy work.
So why didn’t it work for me? Why didn’t it work in a satisfying way? Well, I don’t really have a clue right now. Maybe that is why I started writing this article now, to clear my mind, organize my mind, thing and write about things like goals and strategies and why they didn’t work for me, at least not in the long term.
Yeah, pretty human I guess, setting goals. Except I have no clue what goals to set, what I still want to achieve. As I am so discouraged with things falling apart after having achieved some important goals. So I guess I am just scared to set goals again and achieve them as I believe the result will just fall apart the moment or shortly after I reach the goal.
But yes, somehow I still have goals, somehow I still want things, otherwise I would not be writing here, otherwise I would already have killed myself. And somehow my current goal is something like ‘getting unstuck’ as I feel stuck and don’t know how to get out of it. So implicitly I do want to get out of that, out of the ‘stuck’.
So as per program, I could set my goal for today to get or be unstuck just for today, yes, just for today.
Well, yes, of course it needs some kind of strategy to reach a goal. Or no, as I could just leave everything to Higher Power, to God, to The Universe. But then, in the last case, why would I be here and do anything anyhow. I guess I am, human beings are, kind of intended to set goals and try to reach them. That is just nature.
So what would be my strategy to get or be unstuck for today, just for today? Well, maybe I already set some strategy as I am writing here, about being stuck and getting unstuck, about not knowing what to do. But I am doing things as I am writing here. And implicitly I have another goal, as I still want to update the DoctorsConnect site as that update is long overdue. And yes, I could feel guilty and bad about it, and somehow I do, but I am learning that the past is just the past and right now I know no way to change the past. So the only thing I can do is do something today, do something now; not yesterday, not tomorrow, but just now, just today.
So what would be my strategy for today, my strategy for being unstuck, getting unstuck? Well, maybe just take a shower now, then work a bit on DoctorsConnect, and then I don’t know as I also know I need to be very careful and kind to myself as apparently I am very sick.
And then of course my goal for today is finishing what I was not able to finish yesterday: update the DoctorsConnect site.
And maybe just be satisfied if I only do that today as a work assignment, and nothing more, not all the things that are in my head that I want to do, feel the need to do. So just do one thing today, just one thing and just for today. Nothing more, nothing less.