There is a subject in my mind for a few days already, but right now I can’t remember it. In my mind it’s quite a positive subject and important to write about, to write here. Weird, it’s just fully gone now. And I don’t feel inspiration right now to write even. It has been raining all day and I feel locked up. And i realize that i feel locked up for quite a while now, actually since I lost the freedom to roam around with a car. And today I thought also how privileged I actually am, or maybe was, as I have traveled the world, have seen many places, while many people can’t move at all, never really leave the place where they were born.
Still, I’m not sure what’s worse, having had something and lose it or not having had it at all. I am starting to believe that having had something and losing it may be worse than not having had it at all. I realize now that i have been spoilt before, that I had a lot of things, that I may have taken too much before without giving or giving back. So maybe my current situation is the punishment for that. But still, on the other hand, there is enough in the world for everybody. We have become so efficient at everything, at least producing material things, that I guess everybody could have everything he wants.
Ah, and that’s the subject that was in my mind before, that I am starting to realize what ‘organized effort’, or capital as Napoleon Hill also calls it, has brought us. So yes, I see now how it works. But I don’t feel part of it anymore as I have the ideas, but don’t know how to implement them, don’t know how to involve other people.
So yes, that’s frustrating. Somehow seeing what a leader is, what a leader can do for the benefit of everybody, and not being able to implement it due to lack of some skill, due to some personality thing.
And I’m complaining again. But what nice stuff is there at the moment. I just feel locked up. I did my best and even today tried to work hard, yes, basically for myself, but I guess my customer and his customers would also benefit.
Anyhow, let’s stop here, as I’m not adding anything. Not with this post and maybe not even with this site as there seem to be so many people doing a similar thing and doing it better.
Although no, I’m starting to get annoyed with the commerce behind all of it. That all the e-mails of the sites I signed up for seem to just have one purpose: sell more. And yes, the services help people and could even help me. But in the end it’s about the person selling the service wanting to sell more. Or isn’t it? I still don’t get it, the give and take thing.