Self analysis, question 39

I just got an e-mail I don’t like so much as it is a request for additional information about mistakes I have made. And it makes me scared and it also annoys me, as I could have never made the mistakes if I wouldn’t have taken the responsibility I took. So I am quite affected by this in a negative way as I hoped I would have gotten away with my mistakes but apparently I didn’t.

So what does this mean? Should I have never taken this responsibility? I guess not. And what have I learned from it? Well, not sure, as I believe I still make similar mistakes.

Anyhow, maybe just go with today’s self analysis question, as I am trying to develop the habit of not dealing with things straight away, like dealing with this e-mail or answering it right now. But I do feel very uncomfortable right now, but maybe today’s question will help me get some more clarity on this.

And today’s question is “Do you form your own opinions or permit yourself to be influenced by other people”? And I guess this certainly relates to the situation related to the e-mail, as my own opinion is that I made mistakes, but the other side also made mistakes. And other involved parties made mistakes. And I am certainly influenced by other people in this case as I take their opinions so serious that I am really affected by it.

Ah, and another opinion of myself is that I still don’t know how I could have done things differently as given the same situation, the same circumstances I would probably do the same.

And how would I make up for the mistakes, correct the mistakes? Well, that is a very difficult question that I don’t know how to answer, as I don’t see any reasonable way to correct the mistakes. And I am quite sure the other party or parties involved would know how I should correct the mistakes. But I don’t agree with that opinion. As they are not me and don’t know my exact situation, don’t know what I feel, where I stand, why I did and do what I did and do.

And this all goes back to that we all grow up by experiencing others opinions, about right and wrong for example.

So what is really ‘my’ opinion?

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