Tag Archives: Self analysis

Self analysis, question 48

Today’s question is an interesting one to me: “By what rules do you judge who is helpful and who is damaging to you”? And I never really was explicit in answering it, so this may be the time.

And strangely enough nothing really comes to mind right now, so this may be a big opportunity to make progress as the question, and the answer, may be very important.

And maybe nothing comes to my mind because I wouldn’t consider people helpful or damaging. Or at least I can’t really imaging why people would (want to) be damaging, so I kind of implicitly presume everybody would be helpful, or at least not damaging.

But when writing about it I know there are people helpful to me. And I know there are people damaging to me.

And I keep turning around and around right now. So who would I consider helpful? Well, I guess people who would help me find work, or find a partner. Or people who would listen to me and/or give me advice.

But again, the last is not really a good answer, as advice, read ‘opinion’ is easily given by virtually everybody. So what would be good advice? Well, advice that would help me. But with that answer the circle is closed again, as what would be helpful to me?

So what would be damaging? Well, I guess people doing me physical or emotional or financial damage. And there are a lot of people out there who at least would want to do the last in exchange for their own personal gain.

And well, I am really stunned I don’t know anything more to say about today’s question. So maybe for the next few days I should ask myself about everybody I encounter whether I would consider them helpful or damaging, and maybe more important, why.

Self analysis, question 47

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Today’s question is “Could it be possible that some person whom you consider to be a friend is, in reality, your worst enemy, because of his negative influence on your mind?”. And again the first thing that comes to my mind is my partner, as he is often opposed to everything I do and often calls me all kinds of things which I certainly don’t consider positive.

But there are other people like this also, as I found out that my mam also seems to have a very negative influence on my mind. And while writing this there may be others.

And this whole thing makes me think that it may be indeed of the utmost importance to close our minds for negative influences of other people.

And I tend to avoid people in those cases, but I don’t think that’s the solution.

So let’s find a shield.

Self analysis question 46

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I am still very tired and not really in the mood to write anything, so I could either write a very short post like this or still continue with the self analysis questions. And I just decided on the last and today’s question is “What connection, if any, do you see between the people with whom you associate most closely, and any unhappiness you may experience?”.

And yes, the first thing that comes into my mind is that the person I associate with most closely, my partner, may be the cause of my unhappiness. And yes, I guess you would ask why I (still) allow that. And I often ask that to myself of course. And I have no real answer to that. Or actually I have a lot, but I don’t want to share that here. What I do want to share is that I am still not sure if this whole thing has anything to do with my partner (doubt?!). And I could share that it has something to do with the definite purpose I chose.

And I am thinking of other people I associate closely and I don’t really see any cause for unhappiness there, although I found that talking with my mam often upset me. But I think I am in the process of changing that.

And now I really feel tired and not really able to write anything sensible here. So I guess the best thing is to rest and sleep, even though there are some things I still want to finish before sleeping.

Self analysis question 45

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Ah, the self analysis question of today is one I don’t like to answer. As it is the question “If you believe that ‘birds of a feather flock together’, what have you learned about yourself by studying the friends whom you attract?”. But maybe this ‘trying to avoid’ means there is something important going on here, so maybe I am onto something if I answer this question carefully and analyze the answer.

And the reason that I don’t like this question is that I don’t have any friends, or at least that is how it appears to me. So when I answer the question I would have to answer that I don’t attract people as friends.

However, on second thought the question starts with something else. It start with whether I believe in the saying that birds of a feather flock together. And I am not sure if I believe in that. Or actually I don’t, as I think I believe more in the idea of ‘opposites attract’. As e.g. my partner is, or appears to be, the complete opposite of me. Although I believe that is also not true, as we may be more similar than I think as he is also pretty introvert and doesn’t have many real friends. And yes, he is very sociable and I am not, so he has many friends and I have not. But knowing him he probably also doesn’t have many or even any who really know him, whom he really shares everything with.

And I am not sure how to continue right now, as I am thinking about things like “what is a friend”? And to me a friend is someone you can share anything with, and I used to know people like that. And yes, I still know them, but I didn’t stay in touch as that is not easy from The Philippines and without money (to travel and visit them). As it is not easy to stay in touch through e-mail and Skype and such, even though of course modern technology has made it much easier to stay in touch with people far away. But meeting in person and meeting regularly is still different.

And yes, it worries(?!) me that I don’t seem to have any friends, as I believe friends are very important. And I have been thinking about this for quite a while and also have been trying to do something about it, but until now I have not really succeeded finding new friends.

Ah, and this is a tough one, this question, this post, as indeed there are some major issues here I may want or need to address. And yes, I guess it also goes back to my codependency, not able to share or show emotions or ask for help.

So let’s call it quits for today as I am also very tired and need some rest. But I may have something here to work on, some weakness to address I guess.

Self analysis question 44

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I decided to go back to the self analysis questions after some intermezzo with some other stuff. An intermezzo mainly because of our sick dog that was at the vet and that cost me a lot of time and energy. And this also may point to some weaknesses of mine: being quite emotional and only being able to focus on one thing most of the time, like focusing as if there is nothing else.

But let’s finish this online self analysis and today’s self analysis question is “Do you feel it your duty to share other people’s worries? If so, why?”.

And of course I have seen this question many times before, but until now I don’t fully get what it means, or what the answer would mean.

And the first thing that comes into my mind is that I don’t feel it my duty to share other people’s worries as everybody has his or her own life with his or her own worries. And no, I don’t think it is our duty to take over other people’s worries.

However, I do feel it my duty to understand other people and try to help them if possible. As in the end I guess we are here to help each other.

But no, still no real feeling related to this question, or it’s answer.

So today I think I’ll pass.