Ah, the self analysis question of today is one I don’t like to answer. As it is the question “If you believe that ‘birds of a feather flock together’, what have you learned about yourself by studying the friends whom you attract?”. But maybe this ‘trying to avoid’ means there is something important going on here, so maybe I am onto something if I answer this question carefully and analyze the answer.
And the reason that I don’t like this question is that I don’t have any friends, or at least that is how it appears to me. So when I answer the question I would have to answer that I don’t attract people as friends.
However, on second thought the question starts with something else. It start with whether I believe in the saying that birds of a feather flock together. And I am not sure if I believe in that. Or actually I don’t, as I think I believe more in the idea of ‘opposites attract’. As e.g. my partner is, or appears to be, the complete opposite of me. Although I believe that is also not true, as we may be more similar than I think as he is also pretty introvert and doesn’t have many real friends. And yes, he is very sociable and I am not, so he has many friends and I have not. But knowing him he probably also doesn’t have many or even any who really know him, whom he really shares everything with.
And I am not sure how to continue right now, as I am thinking about things like “what is a friend”? And to me a friend is someone you can share anything with, and I used to know people like that. And yes, I still know them, but I didn’t stay in touch as that is not easy from The Philippines and without money (to travel and visit them). As it is not easy to stay in touch through e-mail and Skype and such, even though of course modern technology has made it much easier to stay in touch with people far away. But meeting in person and meeting regularly is still different.
And yes, it worries(?!) me that I don’t seem to have any friends, as I believe friends are very important. And I have been thinking about this for quite a while and also have been trying to do something about it, but until now I have not really succeeded finding new friends.
Ah, and this is a tough one, this question, this post, as indeed there are some major issues here I may want or need to address. And yes, I guess it also goes back to my codependency, not able to share or show emotions or ask for help.
So let’s call it quits for today as I am also very tired and need some rest. But I may have something here to work on, some weakness to address I guess.
