Postponing?

A bit a weird question to me today: “Are you permitting some relative or acquaintance to worry you? If so, why?”. And the first thing that comes to me now if the question is about me worrying about someone else or someone else worrying about me. And of course I am quite sure it is the first, me worrying about some relative or acquaintance.

So am I worrying about some relative or acquaintance? Well, I guess not, although I think I did more before.

Or could it be it is meant that the behavior or opinion of someone would be worrying me. And I guess that is the case and it goes back to previous questions that I have obligations to other people I don’t like and I can’t fulfill which makes me very embarrassed and indeed makes me worry about that.

So why am I not addressing that? Well, because I still believe things will get better, even though for the last ten, fifteen years they only got worse.

And yes, these worries affect me a lot, even though I pretend they are not. Or somehow I push them aside, try to ignore them. But yes, these things affect me, affect me a lot.

So what is the weakness here, what is there to improve?

Maybe I should indeed address the issue in a way that it wouldn’t worry me so much anymore, as indeed, worrying about things is killing.

And I still don’t know what, but these questions are starting to make me think more, think about issues I don’t want to solve, things I postpone, things I don’t make decisions about.

For quite a while already I feel kind of stuck. And the main reason is that through past experience I don’t really know what to do, what do to achieve my goals. Or no, the main thing is just that I went down too deep, I don’t see any way out. Or I do, but it’s just too big.

And it’s a very weird circle it feels I have put myself in. As I have made some decisions on what I want, what my real goals are. And they are founded quite deep now, based on what I have learned from Napoleon Hill, from his book Think and Grow Rich, from the Principles of Success. And all is mixed it with the ideas of Abraham Hicks and everything else I know, either from own experience or from all kinds of psychology and self help stuff.

But something doesn’t add up and I still can’t figure out what it is. Or maybe I do, as that’s basically what I started this post with, as the main thing is I don’t know what to DO. And from Napoleon Hill’s point of view that means I can’t make any planning. And from Abraham Hicks’ point of view that’s the wrong question (as he focuses on how you want to FEEL).

And I’m also still thinking about the weird connection between past, present (or actually NOW) and future. And related to the NOW the ideas of Napoleon Hill and Abraham Hicks don’t seem to contradict each other as they appear to do. As Napoleon Hill states something like everything starts from DESIRE, where Abraham Hicks states something like everything starts from FEELING (good).

So maybe the answer is indeed in the last paragraph. Maybe I should indeed go (back) to the feeling place of what i want, as that’s where the desire starts. And indeed, actions come from desire and desire only. And planning will follow.

Tag Archives: Stuck

Self analysis, question 14

Overcoming past experience