Tag Archives: Feeling

Like cells in a body

I have been thinking a lot about humans and humanity and about the similarity of human cells in a body compared to humans in a, yes, what? And the question is of course if there is some kind of higher consciousness than ‘human’. And indeed, how would humans fit into that than? We all like to think we are unique, but if I look around I see humans, and many other things and creatures, just acting in the world like cells and all kinds of things in the body.

The strange thing however still is that humans distinguish something like ‘good’ and ‘bad’, which the more I think about it is a crazy idea. As ‘things’, including ‘living things’ just are what they are. And somehow the human mind, the human consciousness seems to have created some kind of concept of ‘good’ and ‘bad’. And it’s everywhere, in religions and I guess also in philosophy, although I am basically only familiar with the christian religion as that’s what I grew up with. But especially there, at the start, there is something like a higher consciousness, a God, who made humans ‘in his own image’ or something. And the story of creation in Genesis is indeed about the human ‘fall’ understanding ‘good’ and ‘bad’, meaning becoming like God, like the higher being, like the higher consciousness.

But then what is this higher consciousness? And how do humans fit into that? Are humans really unique or do also have cells in a body some kind of consciousness?

And all of this is related to something I thought about our financial system at the moment, where I think things are ‘wrong’, or maybe better stated, are not working, at least not for me and for many other people. So I was wondering if the cells in a body also have some kind of paying system. And my first thinking was ‘no’, as I never heard of anything like that. As it seems the cells in a body just seem to work together to create something like the ‘higher being’ man. Or, while writing, animal. And they just seem to do what they are supposed to do, nothing more, nothing less, without any apparent payment or ‘feeling bad’ or ‘feeling good’.

And yes, behind all this, behind this post is also the thinking of Abraham Hicks, that everything has a ‘preference’, that everything has a choice. And yes, that’s also what The Matrix is all about, the problem of choice. And that’s what also the bible and probably other religions are also about.

Anyhow, what I was thinking was if we couldn’t look at the cells in our body cooperating with each other and with the ‘higher being’, the human, to create, well, the human. As that system seems to be a much more cooperative system than ‘humans’ and ‘the world’. But of course I cannot be sure, as how would I find out if the cells in my body are happy or sad? They apparently exist on a different level of consciousness than I am, similar to probably consciousnesses on higher levels than humans.

Or are we just on the road to something ‘higher’? Is that why so many people feel ‘bad’, why so many people are unhappy?

As indeed, I believe happiness and cooperation are the key, are the things that should be. And not unhappiness or separation.

So yes, let’s look more how the cells and the body do all this. how they relate to each other and try to make life easier for all.

What a day

What a day was today. And it started something like last Friday or Saturday when I found that one of the hard disks in one of my main servers had malfunctioned. And this time it was a major thing as my main development environment was not available, meaning I couldn’t really work on my major project.

So I was very down and my mood was not so good the last few days, but somehow I have already learned something like ‘this too shall pass’ and something like ‘it can and just will be fixed sooner or later’. And what I learned the last few days that by slowly planning and doing the things needed to fix the problem, or actually problems, I slowly moved from a very unstable and not fully working system to a system that is now kind of working with at least a backup system that is working more or less and the major system in the process of being fully restored, probably tomorrow, but certainly somewhere this week.

And what I also learned is that writing about these things helps me, analyzing these things helps me to realize that things are not as bad as they felt when it actually happened. And I also know more and more that it is important to have backup systems, which I always had, but, like now, not fully in place.

But just like with aviation safety, I realize more and more that I do have backup systems in place, and yes, I also realize more and more that things do go wrong, like hard disks just fail every now and then.

So the next thing is to realize that even something like this, a major crash where I indeed lost quite some data, fortunately this time probably only private data, do happen, will happen. And that you just need to be prepared for that. And that I, and probably you, are more prepared than you think. At least if you think a little bit like me.

So next thing is to learn to not be so much affected by a simple, normal failure of a hard disk or something like that. As it is just part of life and if you are prepared for it, it’s not such a major thing. And with some proper planning it’s not even something to be emotionally affected by it, other than see the positive side that it was not as bad as it originally seemed.

But yes, do have safety features in place, as especially with mechanical stuff and such, things do fail, do have some kind of life time.

Change

I was very down today, and it started earlier this week when I gave in to my partner to invest again in some business venture of him, meaning we again have virtually nothing left, not even to pay our daily needs, while I just got going to stick with spending the money that is coming in. But the last decision was also kind of impossible to stick to anyhow as I decided to pay my health insurance and as basically not much money came in this month as a few customer projects have been delayed.

And somehow I see myself doing things over and over again, things that don’t seem to work. So I feel very tense and feel guilty about that, especially towards my partner, as I have the feeling he just wants me to be happy. But who doesn’t want to be happy?

And yes, some things are fun, like the progress of my new large crazy project, where I get some replies and there seem to be people supporting the idea. And my partner seems to be moving back to me, even though, again, there is money involved, money going to him, from me.

And today there was actually good news, as the damage related to a hard disk that broke down in one of my main computers was kind of limited, even though I can’t use a major database and I probably lost quite some movies.

So no real reason to feel so bad, except, yes, no money again. And actually that affects me a lot, as we can’t do shopping as usual, I can’t go out and indeed, we still don’t have a car or a new motorcycle, so it’s a bit of a hassle to go out, visit friends and such, even though as of the moment a friends car is available as she left it with my partner as she doesn’t need it right now.

Ah, yes, and nothing of the tricks I know, especially from Abraham Hicks, seems to work, like finding something to be happy about, finding something to be grateful about. But maybe indeed stick also with the idea that sometimes you are just limited in the areas of feeling range. Sometimes you are just stuck in an area where there is no real happiness, no real relaxation. Just tension and less tension. So maybe just look for the ‘less tension’.

Ah, and I didn’t even write the post I wanted to write. As I just wanted to write that I also need to change something with how to deal with Inspiration for Success, with this website. As I don’t feel I’m inspiring. And I’m certainly not inspired.

You have a problem

I am kind of upset as my partner keeps telling me I have a problem and I’m not sure how to deal with that. And we were sitting with a friend and it seems she kind of agrees and that hurts me very much. And it seems neither of them seems to see how much I am hurting and affected with what is being said and how I feel attacked by what is said. And somehow I don’t seem to get what my partner expects from me as he wants me to have more understanding and I have no clue what he means. And part of this may be cultural, as I am European and they are Asian and it seems there is quite some difference in how culture works, how individual thinking or group thinking works.

So finally my partner asked me to leave as he was about to hit me again. And no, physical violence in a relationship was never in my vocabulary and somehow it still isn’t, but I know now a bit how it works, at least from the perspective of the person on the receiving end.

So what am I doing wrong here, as it seems the two friends seem to agree that it is me who is the problem. And so yes, I am the one alone and making a stand for what I believe in. And indeed, that is different from a while ago, as I have gained a lot of self confidence and now stay with what I believe in, no matter what others say.

So now, while writing and not knowing what to do, not knowing about this ‘you have a problem’ or ‘you are wrong’ as it arrives, I am not fully sure what is next. As the strange thing indeed is that ‘everybody’, as my partner states it, agrees that I have a problem.

So am I really wrong? No, I don’t think so. But yes, there seems to be a problem, except I don’t know what it is. And while writing I realize that somehow everybody wants to solve this problem.

So how to solve a problem where you don’t understand what’s the problem.

And if everybody wants to solve the problem, then why can’t it be solved?

Yes, yes, yes!

This morning felt like ‘yes, yes, yes’ as I received two e-mails, e-mails indicating that I had reached two people I had been trying to connect to for quite a while right now. And the feeling reminded me of one of the teachings of Abraham Hicks, that you will know when something really arrives, when you are really living your dream or something. And it is a bit strange, as those e-mails were not that important and nothing really happened, nothing really changed. But they gave me this enormous feeling of fulfillment and I actually have no clue why, but somehow the Universe must have answered my prayers or is answering my prayers, makes all those things I and many others started come true.

And tonight another e-mail, with kind of a negative tone like ‘it cannot be done’, but also this e-mail made me very happy as it was a very serious e-mail with a lot of information and it made me feel like someone cared, someone else also wants to make something happen. And this last e-mail reminded me again that you can convert negativity in something positive, that failures and defeat can be stepping stones to success and fulfillment.

So yes, today was a great day. Thank you, Lord!