Updating my desire document

I just made a major update to my desire document. And I was scared doing that, as some dates had passed and I had not achieved the goals that were written by those dates, far from it.

But I had planned it for today, so I had no option but to do it. As I have decided to finish my daily planned items, no matter what. And yes, of course sometimes there are circumstances that I can’t finish it. Like when I am traveling (and as I also have decided not to have a tablet, not to have continuous internet access). And sometimes I forget to write things down correctly, like if things depend on other people and I didn’t write ‘if it pushes through’ or ‘if the other person agrees’. But in general it is very rare that I don’t finish my daily list. And yes, sometimes the list is empty, like when I know I am traveling or something.

But I don’t want to talk about my daily planning today, I wanted to talk about my experience with updating my desire document, an experience I was scared of.

And as usual I was wrong, being scared of something. As my desire document is there to help me and not to scare me. And it did, in an unimaginable way, for more than two years now. And I just checked the date of the original document that became the basis of my desire document, which is October 22,2 014. And the first ‘readable’ version must have been written November 11, 2014, so a little more than two years ago. And of course the major things are just there, nothing really changed, except that I kind of made it more specific, made it even much ‘tighter’ than the original document.

And I am still looking for words to describe what has happened to me, what an enormous power a desire document summons. As when I wrote down my original desires they were completely impossible, or at least they appeared, they felt impossible. And quite soon after the most impossible thing became quite likely. And over the last two years I slowly found myself living the document, which was and is kind of strange. As the document still contains a lot of unrealized goals and, as indicated above, I passed some dates for some important goals without realizing them. But somehow I am just living the document, living my impossible goals from two years ago.

And it is hard to explain how it works, but it works indeed somehow like influencing your subconscious mind. And I noticed that when I realized that when I first started with phrase like ‘I desire to have 1 million dollar’ (no, that’s not in the actual document, as I consider that private), when reading the document over time this felt inadequate, as it felt like it should be ‘I have 1 million dollar’. So in general actual the opposite happened as what I was scared of: I made the document more specific and more in the now than in the future.

So today I made some major updates, basically because some dates had passed. And strangely enough, the new document is more specific, more in the ‘now’ than the original. And no, nothing really changed related to my desires, they are still the same. They just came closer with this new version of my desire document.

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