Tag Archives: Positive thinking

Sort this from that

So here I found myself, after a visit from the local installer from Smart who were able to get my Smart internet connection going again. And it seems the main problem with our Smart connection right now is a weak signal, possibly caused by trees growing or something like that.

And i felt a bit embarrassed because it seems Smart as an organization and the people within Smart have been doing their best to help me, even when I got more and more confused and annoyed and even angry inside, the last i didn’t show. And I still feel a bit embarrassed, but I don’t think I should be, because the problem with the Fair Usage Policy is still there. And the choice of implementing that policy, as a policy and technically, has made everything around problems with our internet connection very confusing and annoying, for me as I guess for the staff within Smart. And I don’t need to be embarrassed about that and everything around it and my complaints and cause around it. But being me I still am, and if I’m a bit like you, like other humans, I guess you can understand that.

And I guess another presumption is still somehow valid. And that is that a company like Smart, with increasing internet demand and improving technology, should still be able to serve me as a customer on a certain plan, no matter whether there are trees growing or not. And the same applies with Globe, who just disconnected me because, as far as I know, technically they can’t serve me properly at the moment. But to me disconnection a business account from an internet company this way is just ‘not done’, from a business as well as a human perspective.

But actually I am kind of happy with all that happened, as it made me think that what I want for humanity is not as simple as i thought. And that organizations like Smart and Globe still work and that there are indeed humans within those organizations trying to help customers, people. And that indeed there were people visiting me today trying to give me back internet access, even though our connection is kind of beyond what the system is capable, of is designed for. And they did and I am writing this from home and I was able to connect our computers to the internet, so all the things that i need updated and such did happen and is happening right now.

So this whole thing around being fully without internet while having two connections because of our location and expected problems with that, brought about a lot of thoughts. And it also brought me back to one of the ideas of Kim Cooper: “Sort this from that”. As there are many things going on.

So some facts or thoughts:

the wireless signal for our Smart internet connection is very weak;
the environment, like growing trees or something, probably makes the signal even go weaker over time;
I don’t trust Smart anymore, as before my complaints in my experience improved the connection;
many or most people within large organizations do want to help people, but are often just limited, either by knowledge or by being limited by their management;
(large) organizations are (still) driven by money, by greed, as that’s just how we built our world;
I and you are part of the system. I often see myself switch roles from demanding customer to helpless human to not willing or not being able to pay business man or consumer;
there is a lot of complicated technology involved in making things, making the internet work and that technology is progressing, changing fast;
we are all part of driving the changes, even though it has consequences like not being able to serve existing customers, people anymore;
I am not sure if my case, my experiences with large organizations are common or not;
I would love to pay more for my internet, but as of the moment business wise and private that’s not really an option. And this whole thing goes back to the fact that the money flow in the world is not working properly as of the moment;
etc.

Well, enough for now, but one of my last thoughts was that there must be better ways to make companies more human again, but that the whole thing is a system, where we as customers are part of the system as well as the organizations and the people within our organizations. So we help keep the system into place with our demands, which may just be wrong based on wrong presumptions or may just be unreasonable.

Looking forward to your thoughts on this whole thing, either from within those organizations or as a customer, a human with needs an organization could deliver.

Dealing with big powerful companies

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Well, I’m trying to see my internet connection problems as opportunity, because what is happening to me now with my internet is exactly what Inspiration for Success is partly about: big companies not being human or customer friendly anymore.

But not easy again and no success in sight, sitting in an internet cafe as both my service providers can’t deliver internet at my house at the moment. And I tend to be sarcastic about it, like “Is this progress” and maybe it is as I guess they are trying to serve the (growing) mobile internet market. But for me it is very inconvenient and costly and annoying.

So let’s see where this goes, and remember, it’s not about Smart and Globe, but more about Philippine culture and large companies not being able to serve customers as humans anymore.

And I want to share one link now where I will share more of my story with Smart, as of the moment not even having understood my letter it seems: https://www.facebook.com/fairusagepolicypldtsmartbro/.

Enough for now as I am very short on time and have also some business issues to settle as running an internet business without internet is not easy. And that’s also why we have two connections, but that doesn’t seem to be enough, but fortunately there is still a third and more solutions, like now an internet cafe with a good connection.

Persistence again

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Happy Sun Well, today was about persistence again as it seemed that everything that could go wrong did go wrong, even until fifteen minutes ago.

And I am still wondering if this is what all successful people seem to say, that you just need to go on until you’re there, no matter what.

So right now I am kind of asking myself if I’m successful. And somehow I am, as I am writing this post which is something I wanted to do today. And I just worked a little on the tools page, the part of the site that is going to give value to the site in the form of some kind of service. And I did do some work today, also something I planned. And in the mean time my biggest desire, my greatest dream, the impossible thing that I wanted to happen seems to start happening. So yes, somehow I am successful.

But some part of the success is still missing and I have no clue how to get there. And that is still the financial success I am looking for. And that type of success has different stages, where as of the moment somehow my biggest issue is that I have debts that don’t suit me and that I never expected to have. And somehow I just had some kind of discussion about abundance with someone in Facebook where she was pointing out that abundance comes from cost cutting. But to me abundance is about things coming to you and that is quite the opposite to cutting, cutting anything.

And yes, thinking from reason and what everybody believes you would get richer financially by living within your means and indeed cost cutting if you are living beyond your means or want to save for the future. But thinking from the ideas of Abraham Hicks and the Law of Attraction cost cutting wouldn’t bring you anywhere, except from, indeed, cost cutting, not using stuff. And yes, also Napoleon Hill states that living beyond your means will get you in trouble, will be an issue on the road to success, on the way to financial success.

But looking at myself just working hard also doesn’t bring you anywhere in the end. I used to have some very good jobs and made quite some money, and yes, I saved a lot. And most of my life I have been very frugal and that also brought me to the point where I had quite some money in the bank. And in that period I also spent a lot, on holidays and all kinds of nice stuff.

But in the end it didn’t bring me anywhere. And looking back somehow I was going on ‘strength’, not on ‘feeling’. And from that feeling I went down. Yes, indeed, very slowly, but down I went. But recently I go more from feeling and with that it seems I am going up, no matter how frustrated I am with my financial situation. But up I went, at least emotionally and as a person.

So as of the moment I don’t know for sure what to believe, what to do, how to choose between abundance and cost cutting.

So looking forward to your thoughts.

Living in the now

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Motorstar Hawk II
I woke up very late with a terrible mood and I couldn’t really figure out why as I drank only one drink with alcohol last night and had water and some coke after only. And it meant that I might not be able to fetch our motorcycle that had been in the shop again for a week as I did not find the time to pick it up as it might not have been repaired. Or actually I was just scared going there, as last time they didn’t want to help me anymore because they don’t know what to do as this motorcycle has some weird quirks and actually just needs to be replaced.

So while walking down many, mostly negative, thoughts entered my mind, worries about my debts, worries about not having enough work, and related to that not having enough money and all those bad things that might happen when I would face my motorcycle troubles and the staff in the motorcycle shop.

And suddenly I realized that I was walking down this beautiful road in a beautiful environment with trees all around me, an environment that I always imagined, but would be impossible in The Netherlands as that type of forest does not really exist anymore. And I realize just now that I always imagined a house in the forest and that I have that now, something impossible before. So again, be careful what you wish for, because mostly you’ll get it. Of course I didn’t imagine the troubles and the debts I am experiencing lately, but still, while writing this I realize that I indeed often am not grateful for the things that came to me, the things I wanted and that appeared to be impossible.

And also someone told me a few days ago how beautiful this location is and said she would miss it a lot and yes, I often forget that as I’m mostly think of the troubles and the hassle it is as of the moment to keep the place. But as I often tell myself also lately, I’m still here, and that’s still something, no matter the way how I do it or the price I and maybe some other people are paying. And maybe that’s also the thing Napoleon Hill mentions: there is no such thing as having something for nothing. So yes, I should be and can be very grateful for where I am and that I’m still living a very luxury life even though it is not as luxury as I was used to and I think I deserve and am worth of.

So while walking down with thinking a lot of worry type thoughts I suddenly realized (again) that I was walking down this beautiful road with a lot of trees and beautiful nature around and that most people, maybe even 99.99% or more of all people in the world would be really jealous being able to be where I was and what I could experience. And also now, I’m working at one of the most beautiful locations in the world with a view that is so stunning that most people would never even see that in a lifetime. And I’m just here and often don’t even see it, let alone enjoy it.

And I’m trying to make some kind of comprehensive post out of this, but my mind keeps on wandering to all kinds of related things, like recently I decided to spend the money for new contact lenses, which according to all common rules I grew up with actually can’t afford. But they make the world so much clearer, like right now I can see the view clearly and it is so beautiful and peaceful and yes, it’s all there for me now, for me alone, as no one else can experience this view right now as our house is in a very special location where the view is just different from any other location I know, even nearby locations.

And that’s also what bothers me, as I like to share the view, share the house, but somehow until now that never happened as I had in mind, at least not in recent years. And yes, this Christmas was fantastic with the family of my partner visiting and some friends visiting, all of course enjoying the house and the view. But the house is kind of falling apart and until now I didn’t find any way how to stop that, as we just can’t afford the repairs, basically no repairs at all. And it’s also sad to see we don’t have enough beds and stuff, and I realized this Christmas also not enough plates and other kitchenware to receive people in a decent, worthy way. But the other side is that as far as I know nobody has been paying anything in money, meaning that most of the food and the coffee and the drinks were paid by us, paid by money we have borrowed. And that doesn’t make it easy, to know that you are more in trouble next week as your debt has increased again, where you know you can’t even pay the principal amount, let alone all the interest that is building up and building up. So I have been trying to focus on the ‘giving’ on trying to not let the people know too much hat’s going on, not let the people know in how deep shit I am. But it’s not easy and somehow it’s eating me from the inside, as I don’t know where to go, don’t know where to find the money, don’t know where to find a job or jobs. And yes, this is still about ‘living in the now’, the title I started this post with. Because for the last one and half year or so I have been living from day to day, something like ‘living in the now’, even though I know that’s not exactly the same.

And that is also what I was thinking while walking down, like living in the now, living from day to day sounds nice, but somehow there is also more, there is also ‘future’, where ‘future’ is partly or fully defined by decisions I am making right now.

And I also know I wrote about this same subject recently, living in the now. And I don’t remember what I wrote there, but it may have been similar to what I’m writing right now. But yes, right now, there is nothing but writing here, enjoying the view, enjoying where and who I am and there is no use in thinking about money or debt or getting (more) money or getting out of debt or having a car or having my holiday to Bali that is one of my dreams right now. And that is something I experienced earlier and I think I also wrote about that. That right now, NOW, I don’t need anything. Right now there is plenty of everything I could want or need, even more, much more than I need right now and the rest of the day and even tomorrow and probably next week or even next month. As I don’t plan to go anywhere today or tomorrow, so I don’t need a car or any other transportation. There is food in the house, and drinks. Even junk food and ‘junk’ drinks. So more than a human would ever need. And there is this beautiful view and the equipment I’m using to write this post. There is electricity and internet, even more, much more than I need right now. And yes, there are also many things NOT here right now, many things I want and maybe even need. But right, now, there is nothing not available that I would need, today or tomorrow. There is even much more than I would ever need today or tomorrow.

So yes, that’s living in the now and of course that makes me very happy.

You’re doing it wrong

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I’m not sure what’s going wrong, what I do or don’t do or whatever.

Just five minutes ago someone said to me I did it wrong. And I know he was worried. But it hurt a lot and it still hurts a lot.

And fifteen minutes earlier someone else also told me I did something wrong. And that I ‘should’ do it differently.

And is seems this has been going on all my life, that I did things ‘wrong’ and ‘should’ do things.

So what is this. Am I doing the same to others? Am I somehow evoking these things for others?

And yes, it seems this all goes back to something like self confidence, which apparently I don’t have or at least don’t show.

And I guess it’s all meant well.

But it hurts. So let’s be careful what we say to each other and how we say it. Nobody has the right to judge that what we are doing is wrong. Or tell us that we ‘should’ do something.

Am very interested if you have similar experiences or have a different opinion about this.