Tag Archives: Feeling

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Well, it doesn’t happen often, but last night I was so tired and so late that I just went to bed and let the daily tasks related to Inspiration for Success for what they were and also my regular meeting with my virtual private cabinet. And thinking about the last, some strange things have happened lately. As the ordering of the seats, the people around the table has changed. And that just happened through the initiative of some people who wanted to sit closer to me, at the head, the end of the table. And while writing it were indeed the stronger personalities who just took their place closer by and kind of forced the other people more to the back. So it is true what Napoleon Hill describes about things like this. That the images you create in your mind kind of come alive by themselves. And yes, I am wondering if there is some real relation with those people related to some remark I read from Napoleon Hill about that.

Ulla and YokYok So no progress with my self analysis questions as I just wanted to put some photos here I made with my new smartphone, my new camera. And one of the things I always wanted was to have some more photos of the dogs, so I’ll put one next to this paragraph, even though I didn’t make the photos I had in mind. But it is a start and right now it is dark and I noticed the flash is not so strong or something as photos made in the dark are not that clear.

Selfie And I tried to make a ‘selfie’, something I heard a lot about, but never did as I didn’t have a suitable device for that. And it doesn’t look that good I think, but I’ll just share it here. And with ‘doesn’t look good’ I mean that apparently I didn’t look in the lens and my eyes are closed, but I have the feeling that has partly to do with that the camera was so close to me and that a flat lens may not be as good as a ‘real’ lens, although apparently technology progresses very fast. And somehow I was pleasantly surprised that this ‘app’ thing I never wanted to deal with is able to put photos I make straight into Dropbox so they are available automatically on my computer shortly after I make them. So there are advantages of a smartphone above a normal camera. I still hope for the normal camera though, although for now I can at least share things more visually.

And no, I don’t really plan to use my smartphone privately, like using Facebook all the time, be online all the time. And for now I pretty well managed, but again, I am making good use of my phone/camera for my business as I was able to support my internet marketing project with posting photos in Facebook.

So well, somehow I am making progress, somehow things are changing, as my main project is going well and as also yesterday I got a payment from a new customer. But yes, all of this made me feel very tired, exhausted even last night. And I am still tired, but slowly getting back to normal.

Strange day

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It was a strange day today for several reasons. The first was that I skipped my Inspiration for Success activities last Saturday, something that happens rarely. And I could have done it relatively easy, but I just didn’t feel like it, set some other priorities. And I felt a bit bad about it, but somehow when I was out with friends Saturday evening I decided that was more important. And when I came home I decided that it was just too late or that I was just too tired or whatever.

And I am a little bit worried about it, as recently it happened a few times that I didn’t do my daily Inspiration for Success things as I am scared that I am not disciplined enough anymore. And there may be some truth in that, but I also know that sometimes, or maybe even often, I am overdoing things.

The second reason for today being a strange day was that I felt pretty sick again. Not really sick like the beginning of last week, when I really felt like having fever and needed to rest, but my head just feels like being filled with cotton buds or something and I can’t(?!) really keep my mind focused on things like work; or writing blog items.

And more reasons I don’t really know anymore as I just feel too sick, too lousy to continue with this post. So let’s just call it quits and do better tomorrow.

Self analysis, question 6

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Until now the question “Do you suffer frequently with indigestion? If so, what is the cause” completely didn’t make sense to me, including other references to the word indigestion in Think and Grow Rich as I never had any problems going to the toilet or something, like not being able to digest.

Just now I decided to check what indigestion really means and to my amazement it includes or is mainly related to stomach problems. And the last few months I had quite severe stomach problems, like a burning feeling, even so bad that it affects my sleep, my falling to sleep.

So yes, recently I suffer from indigestion, even a lot. So this question suddenly seems to be related to me, while before I couldn’t relate it in any way to me.

And what I the cause? I have no clue, but I guess it has something to do with some kind of viral or bacterial infection that had gone away after visiting a doctor and taking medicines, but that has come back somewhere during the last week or so, even though the burning feeling has been present for a while now.

So well, something to think about. And maybe something I should have checked after reading Wikipedia.

Self analysis: question 1

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Recently I have been overwhelmed by the most dangerous ‘ghost of fear’, the fear of poverty and in analogy of what I have done in my Dutch site related to codependency I want to answers the self analysis questions from Napoleon Hill as stated in the chapter The Six Ghosts of Fear. And today is a good day to start, as this morning, and the last few mornings and days, I woke up pretty tense, so tense that I could hardly get started doing anything the beginning of the day.

So the first question “Do you complain often of “feeling bad”, and if so, what is the cause?” may be very applicable to my current state and what I am doing in this post and probably am doing in this site. As somehow I started this post with complaining about feeling tense. And feeling tense is inclusive of feeling bad. And looking back at the site I think many of my posts include complaints and probably complaints related to feeling bad.

So yes, it seems I often complain about feeling bad. And as far as I know that is also the reason that many friends don’t want to deal with me anymore, avoid me. And of course I don’t like that and of course that makes me feel bad. So I may be in some kind of circle, feeling bad and with that also creating circumstances that make me feel bad or worse.

So what is the reason behind my feeling bad, what is the cause? And I never found a real answer to that, even though I have read this question quite a few times and also did some effort a while ago to really answer those questions honestly, working on them honestly.

The first thing that comes up with me right now though is that I don’t feel appreciated, that the cause of my feeling bad is that I don’t feel appreciated, or more specifically that my efforts are not being appreciated. And even more specifically that my efforts are not being appreciated by others, especially customers, or before ‘bosses’. And, together with what I have been doing, reading, researching lately, this may indeed be the root cause of my unhappiness, my complaining, that I don’t feel appreciated by others.

And maybe, while writing, the main reason behind that is that I don’t appreciate myself, that I don’t appreciate my efforts or the results of my efforts or just myself. And maybe this first analysis question just points me again to something I found quite a while ago in Think and Grow Rich, that the main cause of failure is lack of self confidence. And that the main ingredient for achieving success is self confidence. And right now I want to add that the main ingredient for success may even just be self acceptance, or more positively stated, self appreciation. As maybe it is true that if you can’t appreciate yourself, how can someone else appreciate you?

So maybe work on that, start with that, looking more at who I am and what I am doing here and appreciating that, just that, appreciating myself.

Guilt

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Yeah, guilt, that seems to be one of the major things bothering me. And I have been writing more about that, that for me guilt and responsibility are about the same, feel about the same. And slowly I start to see they are not the same. As I realized that e.g. Tony Fernandes is responsible for the recent plane crash with an AirAsia plane, but that that absolutely does not mean that he is guilty.

But then, still, where does responsibility end and where does being guilty start? And does making excuses mean that you have to change something or not? Is it only about acknowledging that you have done something wrong or not?

And I notice I am very tired and I just wrote a very long post in my Dutch blog, so I’m going to quite here now.

Sorry.

And the last is indeed meant and at the same time choosing to do something wrong. And it feels okay, so apparently it is okay to apologize and not correct the wrong.