Tag Archives: Stop

Stopped

So the last few days, weeks, or maybe even months I slowly stopped. And the last days I kind of really consciously stopped, stopped kind of everything. As it seems all those things like discipline and habit and Principles of Success and desire document don’t seem to work, didn’t seem to work.

I even kind of stopped the sending of my daily quote, something pretty serious to me. And the writing here, but that didn’t seem to have so much effect or influence.

And it all kind of started with the Coda meetings I am participating in. As that seems to be the first thing ever that kind of makes me feel that something is happening, that something is improving.

And I am not sure if I am right, but it may be the worst advice to someone who is codependent, to work on things like ‘discipline‘ and some or most of the Principles of Success, although the Principles of Success also recognize things like the power of love, romantic love, and something like Infinite Intelligence.

So realizing more and more that I could’t do it, can’t do it, can’t do anything on my own, with my own little human power, a few days ago I decided to give ‘everything’ to God and wait, stop, do nothing anymore.

And it was hard, as I still have work to do, still have no clue how to pay the bills two months from now and desperately looking for love, a new partner, or maybe my current, old partner.

But I just couldn’t, I couldn’t go on forcing and forcing things, something I always do, did. But more importantly, something that doesn’t work, didn’t work.

So here I am, a few days after my ‘giving over’, wanting to share some of my experience.

And not sure what to share, but slowly I started to feel some more freedom, slowly I started to do things, but only things I felt like doing, nothing forced, including not doing some of the items I planned, allowing myself to move them, not do them, as it just didn’t feel good.

And today, or actually yesterday or so, I felt like writing again, writing here, writing something. So that’s what I did.

Outwitting the devil

It was very strange what just happened to me. Somehow I ended up on the site Outwitting the Devil. And what happened after was something like the thing described in the document with ‘the last chapter’, the thing that happened to Napoleon Hill as described in this text. As somehow I felt I was guided to this site, this page, this document. And somehow it feels that it was no accident that it mainly reminded me of the virtual cabinet Napoleon Hill also describes in Think and Grow Rich. And it reminded me of the sessions with my private virtual cabinet a while ago. And it somehow made me believe I should continue with that, restart it. And while writing this I realize that I have felt very lonely lately, especially the last few weeks, as somehow the people who I was talking to (with?) for my Connect Mindanao project have not done so much recently, have not really contributed, have not done their part. So this felt like another project, another business that failed, where I failed to create a team to make it happen, where I failed again to generate some income for myself, some pleasure for myself. So maybe that is also why I was lead to Outwitting the Devil, as it talks about what to do, how to become happy.

And no, I don’t like what I read there and heard everywhere. As somehow it never worked for me, or somehow I didn’t do it or didn’t do it the right way.

So time for meditation right now, even though I still want to finish some things tonight. But maybe first stop.

Stop and relax

I still feel very tired and like doing nothing and I keep feeling some kind of guilty about it. I still want to push, to force to do something. Which of course is kind of stupid, as it seems my body or my mind or the Universe or everything seems to tell me to stop. And no, I am not talking about quitting or avoiding something or procrastination, as that is not how it feels like. I just feel tired, exhausted, and indeed something like I should stop and relax.

And no, I still didn’t, as I am still writing this and I still planned some little things for today I am planning to do, to finish. So I did not stop yet. But yes, I should stop as soon as possible, as what I am doing now, kind of forcing myself doing things where everything in me, my whole being and everything around it says ‘stop’. As I am quite sure there is a reason for that feeling, that knowing.

So know the difference between ‘real’ procrastination (sorry, no link here) and listening to your body, to the Universe, to God. And make time to stop, to relax, if everything in and around you tells you to stop. As there is a reason for that and something better will come out of it if you listen.

Listen to your body

Not sure what is going on as I just feel tired and nothing really seems to work today. Maybe my body is just telling me that it’s enough, that I should slow down a bit or something, as I may have been pushing myself a lot the last few weeks, even though it didn’t feel like that.

So I guess I’ll just call it quits for now and just take a rest for now.

And maybe you should do the same if your body tells you to stop. As about two weeks ago my body really said ‘stop’ and I ended up in the emergency room of the hospital.

Bodies know, you know?

Last thing of the day

Well, it’s a bit late again, so I guess this is about the last thing of the day, even though I still have to send the second batch of the daily inspirational e-mail and maybe one or two other little things. But I think I am basically finished with what I had planned for the day and it is about time also, as it is already past 2 am.

So not really sure what else to write here, as I’m a bit empty from everything I did today. A day that ended pretty well, even though I couldn’t get started (where the Universe seemed too agree with something like ‘stop’), my computer didn’t want to start, one of the major internet connections in the house broke down, and more like that.

But in the end everything went pretty okay, so I guess right now I’ll stop here and just check my list for today if there are no major things I forgot, but I don’t think so, even though I think I forgot some follow up calls. Or actually I am sure of that. But also there, somehow it must not be the time, as the Universe said ‘stop’ around lunch. And recently I listen better to those messages and often that turns out well.

So yes, make sure to listen to that inner voice. And act upon it. It is there for a reason and often, or I even believe always, has the best in mind for you. Like I find recently that delays just put me in touch with the right people at the right time.