Tag Archives: Progress

It’s starting

So where do I stand right now? I still certainly don’t feel successful, especially as my financial situation is still not good and as my partner went away again two weeks ago, very angry. And while I kept going very well since he left, better than ever, yesterday I kind of collapsed emotionally.

But still, somehow my self confidence has grown enormously since my deep down one and a half year ago, the period where the ideas of Napoleon Hill came to me in the form of a book given to me, the book Think and Grow Rich. And somehow these ideas, or at least working from these ideas, from this book, seem to start making sense. And no, it’s not the only book that gave me ideas to work from, but somehow it was the starting point.

So yes, I was very down yesterday. But imagine, yesterday, not the whole two weeks I was alone, where before I was much more affected with these type of things. And also, the idea of definite purpose and not changing decisions (too easily) makes life much easier, including stating dates and stuff and what I am willing to give. As e.g. I now don’t have to think so much anymore when people are asking me things like what I want and why I want it. As it’s just all written down in my desire document and everything that happens to me just gets its place in the ideas that written down there. And I really mean everything that happens to me, positive or negative. As the negatives I just turn into positives, into opportunities. That is my mindset now.

And somehow it is starting to pay off, as today I had some discussions about business, really large business, business in the sense of the things Napoleon Hill writes about in Think and Grow Rich. And somehow these things came to me, I did not really search for it or did effort for it. So indeed there seems to be something like Infinite Intelligence or Law of Attraction that goes beyond what we can see. But the main thing I felt today was more self confidence, like just stating what I want, without excuses or anything, even if it is unreasonable. And apparently just the way I talk about things, just the way how I want things, just stating what I want to happen seems to make an enormous impression on other people. And again, I’m not forcing it, it just comes natural, it’s just the result of the process I’ve been in for the last few years.

So no, I definitely don’t feel successful yet. But something did change, and it is changing big. And yes, of course I am also still scared, but different.

Thank you Lord!

One year, ten years

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Today was a bit a strange day. I woke up and didn’t feel good, as usual, but this time after getting out of bed I realized that I somehow had my hay fever like symptoms again. And I thought how much that affected my life or must have affected my life. And no, I don’t think about that so much anymore, as I don’t feel like having hay fever so much anymore, but this morning it just hit me.

And I was alone, which I don’t like so much, but I’m coping better, much better with that right now, even though somewhere in the background there is that missing feeling, that feeling that ‘something is not okay’. But I’m coping and basically feel okay, feel I’m just being myself.

And I was thinking about money, the stuff you seem to need to do the things you like, like traveling or visiting friends or just buying things. And I need a lot of it right now, mainly as I am afraid that paying my debts is going to take something like ten years, if I start earning a little bit more soon. Otherwise it would take longer or I would never be able to do it. And that’s just paying my debts, no fun, no holidays, no visiting friends or buying nice stuff.

And yeah, I’m doing kind of okay, like today was just a good day as I worked a bit and kind of enjoyed that. But of course I was also thinking about my fifty first birthday tomorrow, where I have no real plans, mainly indeed because I don’t have the budget for that. And because my partner is not here, but if I had some budget i would probably do something. So my delayed fiftieth birthday as I had it in mind is probably not going to happen. And no, I chose to not let it happen on April Fools Day, at least not my way. And yes, looking back I realize I must have made a weird impression to some people. But of course they don’t know the whole story and I’m pretty sure if they knew the whole story they would understand a bit better why I behaved like I did.

So well, things are improving somehow. But I still miss the ‘wow’ feeling, the passion, the inspiration. And I came quite far since about one and a half year ago, when my whole life was in ruins, yes, I certainly came quite far. But no, I’m not inspired, not passionate and I have basically no clue where I’m going, except that I kind of set my goals in stone with my desire document. A document I didn’t feel like reading the last few days, a document I was a bit scared of the last few days.

But that’s why I gave this post a title of a favorite saying of mine: “people often overestimate what they can do in one year, but they underestimate what they can do in ten years”. So let’s stick with that.

Almost there

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Almost there for today, although I’m very tired and have the feeling I am overdoing a bit. But I can still do it and write this post, which is the last but one thing I had planned for today. And yes, I guess I’ll make it a very short one, the same as I can short cut my last planned item for the day. But I did it, no matter what, and this time with a lot less pressure than I used to feel before. This time it feels more like a choice: I can do it and I cannot do it and both is okay.

And yes, in my mind is still the suggestion from someone else, something I read in a book or on a website, that if you can’t do the whole thing, then just start doing 1% of the thing, just to get the feel. And talk about it as if it’s already the whole thing. So that’s always kind of an escape I have if I run short in time for the things I planned to do, but I hardly ever need that escape as I became much more careful in planning.

And for those people who don’t know, I used to be, and I guess I still am, very chaotic and not so disciplined. And becoming more disciplined also came with a very simple trick: making the bed every day. That’s also something I read somewhere and someone once made kind of a negative remark on it. But for me it seemed and seems to work.

So start with little things and try to extend them slowly (if you want). And if you don’t make it, don’t beat yourself up. That’s it.

Power is applied knowledge?

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I was reading the chapter about the Power of the Master Mind in Think and Grow Rich and was amazed what I found there today. As I thought that Master Mind was about controlling other people, about team building, about being the leader in the sense of being the boss. But it seems that I have to change my thinking about that, as that’s not what the power of the master mind is all about; on the contrary.

So what is it? Well, it seem something like inducing other people to apply knowledge for some greater good. But I guess i have to study that chapter a bit more right now, as it seems I have misunderstood the word power all my life.

So no wonder I am a bit lost, as my main strengths, my main positives are joyful, loving and powerful. What internal conflict would that create if you consider power as a negative, as controlling, controlling other people. Because that’s not what i want.

Back to inspiration

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I am trying to go back to inspiration instead of sharing my personal stuff here or using this site to improve the telecom industry in The Philippines or the business climate of the Philippines. And maybe Infinite Intelligence is helping me as I found my copy of Think and Grow Rich and used it today to try to get going again. And I started with the chapter about imagination, the chapter that fell open when I randomly opened the book. And then kept thinking about the list of questions at the end of the book that are intended to know yourself better. And I keep wondering about some questions, especially about entertaining or supporting people with their worries. I still don’t get the meaning of those questions, neither do I have the real answers to them. So yes, also what was said again today in the chapter of imagination, just come back to this chapter at a later time and more things will become clear to you. And what stayed today was the ‘within reason’, about achieving goals, having dreams. And that’s where I more believe in the ideas from Abraham Hicks, like anything, literally anything is possible.

So it seems I’m back on track again, even though I don’t really feel it yet. As I would like to do so much more, but indeed, there is so little you can do on your own. And I’m still on my own with this, and with my business, even though it feels some people, the right people, are coming closer. So maybe it is not yet the right time.

But it soon will be.