Author Archives: Guus

Self help

I am still thinking how I could make this site, this project more useful, more useful for myself and more useful for you. And yesterday while working on the Top Inspirational Sites page I was a bit in doubt what to do, I was asking myself if I had made an error. And the doubt crept in because the traffic to the site went down a bit. And being an internet marketer and looking for success (=a lot of traffic to the site, a lot of people reading my stuff) I was thinking if it has been a good idea to focus on the page Top Inspirational Sites. As that was kind of a reaction to the traffic, to the page that is and was the most popular page on the site. And yes, as far as I remember one of the goals of this site is to point people the way to inspiration, also through work that other people have done. Or maybe mainly through work that other people have done. As over time I also realize more that everything is being built on top of other things, can only be done because other things have been done, because investments have been made.

But sometimes I go back to the origin of the site, the reason for the site, the choice for something like inspiring people, the choice for inspiration. As I have never felt being inspired by other people, especially my dad. And I believe that has affected my life in a very negative way. So going to the origin of the site I often get the idea in mind of connecting people, of connecting people who can and want to inspire to people who want or need to be inspired. But then I always end up that I don’t have enough resources available to make this happen. As until now I have not been able to build a team, to inspire or motivate people to help me, really do some work for the site, like I do, like I have done.

And then I go back to my weakness or weaknesses, where my main weakness seems to be ‘people’, connecting to people, inspiring people, motivating people, doing things for people, serve people. As somehow people always leave me behind; or I leave them behind of course. So it feels I always end up alone and it seems that is very typical for me, although of course I know everybody is or feels alone every now and then.

And looking at the traffic to the site, the site is apparently not good enough yet, at least if I compare it to the stories I hear about other bloggers, other (self help?) site builders. But of course there are two sides to that, as I know how hard it is to get traffic to a site. And having significantly more than 1,000 visitors and more than 2,000 page views per month still means about 1,000 people visit the site, see the stuff I mostly made and wrote. And yes, of course I know it’s stable, as the site is being built very consistently, growing very consistently, even with the inspirational tools I built, even though they are not really being used yet. And yes, I also know that once it does take off, it will take off with a speed that will be higher than I could have ever imagined. That even scares me and while writing right now I know that will happen. As if I keep writing and building I am adding value and one day people who need that value, like the stuff I have been doing, have been working on, will find the site and use the tools.

So maybe, analyzing right now where to go and what to do with Inspiration for Success, it may be actually a good thing that the site is not that popular yet. As I may first need to work on my people skills to have a team ready when the site is really taking off, really doing what it was and is designed for: connecting and inspiring people, for success, to be successful. As I now know I will be with this site, with this project.

Law

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I am more and more amazed with our laws and justice system. As I made some big mistakes around two years ago, mistakes I wouldn’t even known how how to avoid at the time. And I am still being confronted with the results of these mistakes. And the strange thing is that nobody got hurt even, nobody was affected in any negative way, maybe even the opposite. But still, they were mistakes against the law and also against my own laws, my own conscience. So looking back the only person who got hurt was me. And yes, some other people might be affected also in the future, but hurt? Not really.

And this situation makes me think of the story in The Shawshank Redemption. Where one of the main characters asks himself what’s the point of locking someone away for ten, twenty or more years, where for most people the relation between the offense and the punishment would be completely gone after, well, I don’t know after how many months or years. And I think this is so true, even though I guess I underestimate how bad people can be. And yes, looking at myself, would I make the same mistake again? Well, in the same circumstance probably yes. But I would be much more aware of the consequences. As you can’t image how I have suffered, no not through prison or some other legal measure, but through my own conscience, going against my own laws, going against all I believe in, or actually believed in.

And of course I am thinking of coming clean, reporting the mistake I made to the authorities. But I am scared of the consequences. As I have a lot to lose and I believe any punishment would just put me further down. And I guess my crime was not so bad it would put me in prison. But still, I’m not sure, even though I did do research on the punishment for this crime. And a maybe worse alternative punishment would be a fine, as I already have enough financial things to solve. So a fine again would put me further down instead of up.

So I have been thinking a lot about these things, like suppose I was a murderer and my conscience was haunting me. And I would know one day the police, the legal system would find out. What would I do, what would you do? Go to the police and report your crime? And be locked up for a very long time? And losing everything you have? But then again, who would gain from that, someone being locked up for something that already happened and that he regrets a lot. And something he already suffered a lot for, as I am quite sure similar to me this person would have probably punished himself through his consciousness and the feeling how bad it was what he has done.

But yeah, how would you make the difference between someone who has already suffered a lot and someone who really ‘needs’ the punishment, really needs to be locked up. As he or she may hurt others again.

So why do we lock people up? Why do we punish people? What’s the use? And what’s the alternative?

Napoleon

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I know what I am planning to write may be a bit strange and may not fit the purpose of the site, but as you may know I have been experimenting the last few days, the last week, with a ‘virtual private cabinet’ as Napoleon Hill said he created, had, for a long time. And me being me I have kind of been forcing the members of my cabinet to have their own personality as Napoleon Hill states the members of his cabinet had. And of course that didn’t really work, as forcing things mostly or never work. But tonight I had a very strange experience, as somehow indeed the members of my virtual private cabinet started to do ‘their own thing’.

Napoleon Bonaparte And one of the strangest thing was that Napoleon (Bonaparte) took the place of Gandhi. And his reason was that Gandhi was too weak a person for me, that I needed a more strong person. And Gandhi just left, I don’t know where he went and if he would be back.

And some more strange things happened. As some people were late, like Donald Trump and Napoleon Hill. Or actually everybody was late. And it all started with the remark that I was just waiting, somehow indicating that I didn’t really wanted a meeting, needed a meeting. So it was a bit chaotic, where Richard Branson as usual was very friendly and supporting.

Ah, and what probably started all this was that yesterday I started reading Napoleon‘s biography on Wikipedia. And I was amazed about what I found there, as it seems he was defeated and failed many times. And my feeling and I guess the feeling of most people is that he was very successful. But apparently he was not.

And right now I am a bit amazed with how he looks like, about the photo’s(?!) I am finding from him. As he looks completely different from the image I have of him and how he appears in the meetings, in my imagination.

So strange, to see those people, those imaginations of mine, come alive. And I still don’t know what to think of it, if it indeed is my own imagination playing tricks with me, or if there is indeed some kind of reality, some kind of connection to the real original person.

More to follow I guess. And very interesting to me, and for some of you maybe worth a try. And no, it’s not scary, at least not to me. I’m just looking for help and they are helping me. And that’s a big thing to me, as it’s not easy for me to find people, friends in real life helping me.

Why have you forsaken me?

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“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” is something that is in my mind the last few days, as it seems nothing seems to move. And I got the message that help is on the way, a lot of help, more help than I could ever imagine, but it feels like I am back to square one again, no income, no customers, no future plans, no progress, nothing.

And that often brings me to the subject of ‘money’, as it seems without money nothing seems to move. As because I don’t have any income as of the moment (and not enough for quite a while), I feel like I can’t make plans for a holiday or something. Or even go to the city with friends. Or visit family.

And based on the ideas of Napoleon Hill I have worked very hard on all kinds of things lately, among others my internet project. And yes, you can do a lot of things virtually without money. As I just put time and had coffee with people and called and e-mailed them and such. And I came very far, further than I or anyone could have ever imagined. But right now the lack of money, the lack of an investor or investors is starting to hurt. As I really want, or actually need, to go to Manila to meet some people. And I want to formalize the company. And I would like to put some people to work, do some research. And until now I didn’t find anybody who really put some time and effort in the project, except for meeting me, talking with me, at least that’s how it feels or looks from the outside. As they are all busy, mostly because they ‘have to pay the bills’.

And yes, I guess I am not really a team person, a team building person, a people person. But I am good with ideas and I have also converted these ideas into writing, partly even into plans, even though the plans are basically still on the conceptual level. And I can work hard and am very persistent. And I am determined to make this internet thing work.

But while writing I realize that Napoleon Hill states that one needs ‘practical workable plans’, so maybe my plans are not practical or workable enough, at least not good enough. So maybe I should follow the advice and develop new plans. As Napoleon Hill also states that when you are or feel defeated, your plans are not sound enough, not good enough.

But I learn more and more that I can’t do it alone, that I need help.

So who is interested and/or willing to help me develop practical workable plans to achieve my goal:

”Improve internet, starting in Cagayan de Oro City“?