Tag Archives: Discipline

Enough is enough

I had a pretty bad tooth ache today which made me finally give in and just put me on the couch, suffering pretty much and not knowing what to do.

But that lying on the couch made me realize that often I am just too much, do too much, try too hard like not going the extra mile but going twenty extra miles. As I just felt so bad that I couldn’t do anything anymore from a human point of view.

But no, after maybe ten minutes I still couldn’t sit still, lie down and just relax, give my body some peace so I got up again and fortunately found me a better painkiller than the paracetamol I had been using over the day (that didn’t help so much, or only for a short while).

So after that the pain went mainly away and I could do some things again, like finishing my daily planning.

But I did decide just now that I wouldn’t continue with the self analysis questions or write an decent inspiring quote here, that it was and is just time to rest.

So well, I can’t withstand the habit of writing here, but I can (and should) keep it short, even though while writing I feel a little uncomfortable as maybe I am writing posts too easily recently, and that too may be a habit. And the last may not be a good one.

But for now, enough.

Flexible discipline and habit

I am still struggling with going the extra mile and discipline and habit as right now I am tired (again) and don’t really feel like writing a post here and certainly not the next self analysis post.

And yes, I am seeing and feeling the power of habit as I am writing here now. And I am still making the bed every day, even though sometimes, very sometimes, just before I go to bed. But I do it.

And I also feel the habit of doing my little exercise in the morning, even though recently I was not able to do the sets of twenty as is basically my goal, but mostly sets of five that I mostly try to increase over the days.

So yes, these habits have brought me something and they are very powerful. But I am starting to realize I also seem to have developed the habit of being unhappy (instead of happy) and I have no clue how to change that, as all these self help ‘tricks’ don’t seem to help.

And yes, somehow I still don’t feel like I am able to control my thoughts, maybe the most important thing to do in life, maybe the most important message from Think and Grow Rich, from Napoleon Hill.

And I feel like I (still) lost all my desire and recently I lost almost all my sex drive, even though the last always was one of my wishes. But now I have it it’s no fun, as indeed I believe that sex is the major driver of human action, and I am also kind of experiencing that right now, as without my sex drive everything seems so dull, so useless, so aimless.

Ah, and I got back to my daily planning, and it is working, as it gives me some direction for every day and helps me finish things and makes me feel somehow kind of satisfied when I notice that I have all the things that I planned for a day.

So yes, I know all the tricks and even apply many or most or all of them, even keeping a daily gratitude diary.

But no, I am still not living, there is still something missing and I have no clue what, or how to get it, even though I feel it must be there.

So no, not a positive post today, although writing this down, making this analysis, could be the start of finding a solution, the solution. The solution how to live and enjoy life.


Ah, one good thing, as while finishing this post Ulla came to me, the dog that is still alive because,. next to other things, I decided to bring her to the vet, do everything I could to make her survive. And her coming to me just now gave me a very good feeling, even made me kind of feel happy.

The power of habit

Ulla in recovery.Yesterday I skipped writing here and sending an inspirational quote, and with good reason I believe, as I was pretty tired and next to that ended up in the emergency room of a hospital because I had an asthma attack in the middle of the night and came home pretty late and pretty much affected by that.

And today I promised myself the rest of the day off after getting more clarity on the situation of our sick dog Ulla, something I was pretty much affected by most of the week.

But for quite a while I realize that I have developed a pretty strong habit of writing here every day and that no matter that I got a bit more flexible, to say it in a nice way, with it, it is pretty hard to skip as I have a pretty strong urge to do it, no matter how late or no matter how busy or tired I am.

So also today only a short post, but it is a post and I also sent the first batch of the daily inspirational quote and will send the second batch later also.

So yes, there is something to developing habits. They are hard to break (whether positive or negative, but I believe my daily writing here is a positive).

Self analysis, question 42

I still feel very stressed so it seems that my journey of working from Think and Grow Rich didn’t deliver what I expected from it. Or maybe better say, hoped from it. And I still can’t imagine other people feel as stressed as I do, or did most of my life. So how would I ever live a normal life with a little happiness and such in it? And would answering these self analysis questions help?

Anyhow, it is often said that one should never give up, so let’s just continue working on the self analysis questions, even though I got an e-mail just half an hour ago that hit me very hard as it is about something I have no clue how to solve it.

But let’s just persist and work on today’s question: “Are you conscious of possessing spiritual forces of sufficient power to enable you to keep your mind free from all kinds of fear”?

And the answer is definitely ‘no’. Or isn’t it? As I just feel very stressed, which makes me think ‘fear’, so I feel like I don’t have sufficient power to keep me free from stress. And I feel very poor, which makes me feel very bad, but it doesn’t mean I fear poverty (anymore?). As being in this state of feeling poor, which I still don’t really am as I still have quite some capital in the form of part ownership in The Malasag House, so if that is sold (or mortgaged further) I am out of direct financial trouble.

Anyhow, everything lately seems to point to spirituality, so maybe I should look more in that direction to deal with my stress, with my feeling tortured by, yes, who or what?

Self analysis, question 40

I never realized there were more than 40 self analysis questions, but I knew there were a lot. More than 40 is impressive though and there are still quite a lot to go.

Today’s question amazes me a bit though  because I already answered it, but apparently I didn’t, at least not in public, not in the site like I am doing now.

And today’s question is “Have you learned how to create a mental state of mind with which you can shield yourself against all discouraging influences”? And the answer is certainly no, as I am often pretty much discouraged. Although when writing this down I think I improved a bit, or even a lot, as slowly I somehow tell myself positive things when I feel discouraged. Like that I still have a lot of time, as ‘age’ is just an excuse (according to Napoleon Hill). And also that in the end with persistence you get quite far, as that is what I seem to read very often lately.

And I know I am persistent, so it is certainly encouraging to read that persistence seems to be one of the major things that helps one achieve success.

And yes, I am learning and developed some pretty good habits, and a good sample of the last is that I am writing here even though I feel very, very tired.

But the habit keeps me going.

So well, I am getting more and more confident that I will achieve success, in the end, even though a bit late. But as they say: “better late than never”.